Buffy's Blog

I know my blog has been pretty neglected for months, however, I made a header and it's name is Buffy's Blog. Ha ha! I'm not a professional blogger, but I want my blog to be an outlet for me, creative or otherwise, and to reflect more of me than just being a Mom, etc. etc. I was dubbed "Buffy", I hope affectionately, by a neighbor friend in high school and it stuck. Buffy was me before marriage, before kids, and it represents a time when I didn't have any labels per se, but was just living life and figuring out who I wanted to be. I guess that still applies today...on second thought, yes, it definitely still applies today. :)

Is She Really Gone

I am missing my friend today. A lot. There are days like this when I still can't believe she's gone. My friend Trudy. It's been almost five years since she died. My mind is flashing back on her smile and laugh, her face, and it's hard to believe that I can't just call her and go see her. To describe the friendship I felt with Trudy is difficult to put into words. An unbreakable bond, a joy and comfort that just always felt like "home". Always laughter, but more than just a sense of fun, a deep comradeship. I don't know if I've ever felt as much belonging as I did in that friendship.

Then, out of the blue, her daughter Linzy called, and I instantly remembered it was her birthday (Linzy's). She told me she's getting married this Fall. I'm so happy that she called, and so sorry that Trudy won't physically be there with me to see her daughter be married. Is it strange that talking to Linzy brings tears to my eyes, and emotions well up all over again? I wonder if she feels the same stab of emotion talking to me as I do talking to her. I feel like exchanging memories about her Mom, and saying again how much she means to me, but I don't want to make anything more painful for her than it already must be. She lost her Mom so much sooner than most of us do. I don't know how that feels. I wish all the comfort of the angels for you Linz, and a wee bit for me too, if possible.

July 1, 2011 P.S. I borrowed this photo from Trudy's sister Jenny that she recently posted on facebook. This is Trudy telling me not to take myself to seriously :)

I miss you every day, Trude.

I Need A Vacation- BAD

So, Jason has been gone to Blanding for work for over a week. I've been with Wyatt for over a week, no breaks. Yup, I'm going to lose it. I'm not one of those people who can spend unlimited time with their children (wait, are there even people like that?). The only thing that keeps me sane is those times when I can check out from mommyhood for a couple hours, either with friends or by myself. Especially because we don't go on real vacations, so those little breaks are literally all I have!

(I can't even daydream about being somewhere else without interruption. Grrrrr!) Just had to vent today.

Updated Links

I was bored out of my mind last night so I added a bunch of links I like to the blog. Now I just need to organize them somehow!

Sir!

This is the look you get from a child that hasn't been photographed in a long, long time. A little too excited, poor kid.

I took a couple pictures of him in his current military phase. He is loving all things soldier, camo, weapony, shooty, saluty. (He actually salutes us, yes).

I've found the 'yes sir' 'no sir' thing really works! If I give him an 'order' followed by 'sir' or 'soldier', I get results! Obedience without question, is this actually possible?? I love it. I love being saluted. I'm fine with being called sir. Maybe I could've had a military career. I'll never know now, unfortunately.

I'm wondering how long I can make this phase last.